Really, for the sake of ourselves... We have to be okay at work, to work. We can't burden our employers or customers with our emotions, it's just not the place for it. So what do we do? We have to become really good actors and liars. We have to answer that question, "how are you?" not with "my life has fallen apart and I feel dead inside" but, "fine thanks, how are you?" Fun stuff. My heart goes out to people who endure truly tragic circumstances and have to work, as who can concentrate through all of that?
The good thing is that work is a break. Sadly, it's a break from all that we would love to be doing if we were independently wealthy, but it's also a break from the hardness that life sometimes uses to crack our skulls. If you can get yourself to focus on a task, and take it one minute at a time, then you can have a moment away from that misery, dread, heartache, or whatever else may be afflicting you. Anyone else have that awful moment where you feel your throat tighten and that familiar face warming sensation that crying brings? I have cried at work, before I could run away. I'll always hate myself for it, because I think it made me look stupid- but I couldn't help it. Perhaps I am emotionally weak, but we are ALL emotional because that is how we are built. I'm not a cryer but when you feel like you are being dragged behind a bus going 80 miles an hour on hell's highway, it could happen. So, you've got to pretend that you drank too much coffee, get the hell out of there and into the bathroom stall as quickly as possible! Not for them, for you.
Oh and friends... Few of us are so blessed as to have real friends that genuinely want to know if you aren't ok. I have a couple of amazing friends that would rather not be friends with someone than have them pretend. But there are many more out there that are only interested in having good times. Nothing wrong with that, but if they can't bear some discomfort for someone else, how much do they really care about you (or maybe just others, period)? Also common is when you just can't stand to burden someone else with your problems. This is 99% of why I don't divulge what's really going on... I have made decisions that have caused me to have the same problems over and over that don't get resolved, so I feel like I should have an allowance of how many times I can go on a vent spree over that one thing that keeps rearing it's ugly-ass head. But oh how lonely it feels sometimes...
Then there are people that can't accept that we have genuine feelings and emotions, and that they can offend/ hurt us. Then it's a matter of pretending to be ok so as not to have them go ape shit on us when we call them out for being hurtful, or maybe even not seeing eye to eye... So yes, everything is fine, really.
I suppose we are all alone together in a way and most of us have probably played most of the characters in the book at one point or another. This is why I believe that creative outlets are so so very important. And if you feel absolutely completely alone, there are a few people out there willing to listen. Absolute isolation is absolutely a lie. Perhaps, we are just all have to keep working on being what the world wants, happier more than not and mostly problem free. Not a bad goal to have.
Photo credit: VinothChandar / Foter / CC BY
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